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Unexpected - Chapter 6: Come Back
Title: Unexpected
Authors:slashpervert and aveeno_baby.
Betas:brknhalo241, asm614, Mini Mouse, and Indie.
Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: ADULT!
Genre: Fluff, Smut, Hurt/Comfort
Pairing: Harry/Draco
Length: 94,000 words (40 Chapters)
Warnings (Mark to Read): Language, Explicit, M/M Sex, Masturbation, Oral, Rimming, Anal, Mpreg, and mental health issues such as anxiety attacks. (Characters in this fiction are over 18.)
Summary: Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy have lived together for four years in their country house surrounded by a magical menagerie of unwanted animals Harry rescues. Yet, Harry wants more. He dreams of a family that includes children.
Notes: Post-war, AU after HBP, not DH compliant. Sequel to Undesirable, though can be read separately. Whereas, Undesirable was very dark, this one is very fluffy with some angst. Thanks tocorvusdea for help with Latin for spells. Icon adapted by slashpervert from Passion by dirty_darella.
Disclaimer: This is a non-commercial work of fan fiction intended for adult audiences only. No copyright infringement intended. (Full Disclaimer!)
Chapter Number/Total: 6/40
Chapter Title: Come Back
Words: 2227 Words
The next day Harry woke up earlier than usual in the morning. He had been having a few dreams, most of them with Elijah or other children. He tried to push thoughts about that out of his mind, distracting himself by going downstairs and feeding the animals. Then he started on breakfast, heading upstairs about an hour later with a tray of food for himself and Draco. Draco, predictably, was still sprawled on the bed.
"Draco," Harry said, getting onto the bed and setting the tray down. He reached to nudge him.
"Mmm?" Draco responded sleepily, hand creeping across the bed toward Harry.
"Breakfast," Harry replied, taking his hand.
Draco blinked, yawning hugely as he stretched. He loved it when the first thing he saw each morning was Harry.
Harry leant over to kiss him. "Come on, breakfast," he said again.
Draco sat up, leaning against the headboard and Harry passed the food over to him, shifting a little closer so he could eat off his plate. Draco speared a strawberry from the bowl Harry had set on the tray and held it out to his lover.
Harry wasn't really hungry, just poking at his food after taking a few bites, but he automatically opened his mouth when Draco held out the strawberry.
Draco placed it in Harry's mouth, his body reacting to the sight of those lips closing around the fruit. Normally Harry would've smiled at him and reached to give Draco a strawberry, but today he just pulled back and chewed, looking back down at his plate. Draco picked up his cup, sipping his tea as he watched Harry. The day before had been difficult and Draco wasn't sure yet if Harry was calm or if this was just the quiet before the storm.
Harry remained quiet, looking off to the side as he idly munched on a sausage. There was so much going through his mind at that moment and he couldn't stop it.
Draco waited, eating his food and watching Harry. He was halfway through his tea when he sighed and reached out, running his fingers through his lover's hair. "How are you doing?"
Harry didn't reply at first, setting his fork down and closing his eyes. "I wanted today to be so great," he started to murmur, biting down on his lip.
Draco set his cup down on the tray and pushed it away. He took Harry's hand and pulled him closer.
"Like, I don't know ... I wasn't expecting to have Elijah here with us now, but today ...." He sighed, rubbing his hands over his face, feeling his eyes begin to water.
"Harry," Draco whispered, "it's okay to be upset." Draco slid his other hand around to the small of Harry's back, a gesture of comfort that also opened him up for Harry to curl against him if he wanted.
"I know, but, it doesn't make it any better," Harry whispered, turning to curl up against Draco's chest as the tears started to fall. "I wanted to take care of him ...."
Draco knew Harry didn't take loss well. He had already lost so much in his life, even before the war and then the trauma of his imprisonment and those he watched die. Draco realised that one of the first dreams Harry had had after beginning to really heal, was of having a family. "I am sorry I made it more difficult too," he said. "I want you to be happy."
"Don't blame this on yourself," Harry said quickly, shaking his head. "I love you ... and if I can't have children while I'm with you, then so be it. It just hurts right now."
Draco made a silent vow to not only contact his Solicitor about what had happened but to find out what wizarding laws said about adoption. "I never want to hurt you," he said, rubbing Harry's back in a soothing circle.
"I know," Harry whispered, sniffling as he wiped at his tears. He knew for a fact that Draco would never, ever harm him.
***
For the next few weeks, Harry didn't feel any better. He became quieter and quieter, and refused to leave the house when Draco even suggested them going to visit friends or for ice cream in Diagon Alley. Harry didn't want to see children. As strange as the thought was, Harry felt that if he saw them, he would think about Elijah and that still hurt him so much that he'd burst into tears at any random moment. So, of course, he didn't go to the orphanage either.
Draco had written to his Solicitor and had not been happy with the news he got back. Ministry of Magic regulations actually forbid wizards and witches from adopting Muggle children. Which meant, even if the orphanage had allowed it, they would have had other legal problems. He hadn’t been pleased to tell Harry, knowing it would only worsen the situation.
Harry was sitting in front of the telly just like he had been for days, still wearing his pyjamas, his knees pulled to his chest as he idly flicked through the channels.
Draco stood in the doorway from the kitchen, arms across his chest, contemplating his lover. Harry's slide, well, fall really, into depression wasn't unexpected but it was difficult. Draco had tried being understanding and letting Harry try to work through it, but it had gone on too long. For Harry's sake, he had to do something or risk an even worse setback. Draco sighed and stepped into the room, waiting to see if Harry even reacted to his presence.
Harry didn't, but he did know Draco was there. He rested his cheek against the top of his knees, letting more of his hair fall in his face
Draco shook his head and stepped between Harry and the television but Harry kept staring at Draco's midsection, as if he could see through him. So Draco reached for the remote.
Harry frowned slightly, but didn't try to reach and get it back. He finally looked up at Draco.
Draco turned the telly off and reached a hand out to tuck back the mess of black hair. "You need a bath," he said softly. Harry made a small face and looked down, shaking his head slightly. Draco crouched in front of him, so that even looking down, Harry could see him. "You stink, Potter," he said. It wasn't just true; it was also a reference to their fourth year at Hogwarts. He waited to see if Harry would get the joke.
Harry realised where it came from, but it just made him sniffle, his lips trembling as he wrapped his arms more tightly around his legs.
It was sort of a test. If Harry could laugh about that or even get annoyed, then he wasn't too bad off. His reaction told Draco that Harry really was having a full blown episode. "Who am I?" he asked.
Harry blinked away the tears that were welling up, not bothering to wipe them away. He licked his lips and tilted his head up a bit. "Malfoy ...."
"Malfoy is it?" Draco asked. "Are you mad at me?"
Harry shook his head slightly, sniffling again as he stared at him.
"Tell me again who I am then?"
"Draco," Harry mumbled this time, rubbing at his nose.
Draco rewarded him with at smile. "That's good. And where are we right now?"
"Home," Harry said replied softly.
"Yes," Draco said. "Will you take a bath with me?"
"Okay," Harry mumbled, but didn't move to get up. When Draco took his hands and stood up, tugging, Harry felt he had no choice but to stand too, not wanting to topple over.
Draco held on to one of Harry's arms, leading him to the stairs. "We'll take a nice bath together, get you out of those smelly pyjamas and into some clean clothes," Draco said soothingly.
Harry just nodded, pushing his hair away from his face. "Tired," he sighed.
Draco led him upstairs, having to pull a bit and then settled Harry to sit on the toilet seat while he got the bath filling. He turned back to Harry and sighed. The entire scene reminded him of the days when he had first gotten Harry out of St Mungo's. He reached to unbutton Harry's top. "I miss you," he whispered.
Harry bit his lip as he watched Draco, feeling the tears welling up again. "It hurts," he said quietly.
"I know, love," Draco said softly, stripping off Harry's shirt. "But you can't let it do this to you. I need you."
Harry shook his head, beginning to cry again as he stood up to have Draco pull his pants off.
Draco tugged them down and then shut off the taps. He tested the temperature of the water. "In you go," he said, taking Harry's arm to help him.
Harry stepped into the bath as his hands covered his face.
Draco made sure Harry was safely seated in the bath before setting to unbuttoning his own shirt. "You want me to join you?"
"Yes," Harry managed to mumble, his voice thick.
Draco undressed and then lowered himself into the bath, reaching for a flannel to soap up. Harry didn't look up at him yet, rubbing at his eye. Flannel soapy, Draco reached and took one of Harry's hands, lathering up his arm. Harry let him, letting his other hand drop, staring down at the water. Draco took his time, washing Harry's arms, shoulders and chest. "Turn around and I'll get your back."
Harry quietly did as he was told, pulling his knees up to his chest.
Draco washed him, flannel sliding down his lover's back. "More?"
Harry shrugged slightly, lifting himself up a little for Draco.
Draco tried not to let his body react as he slid his flannel covered hand down below Harry's waist, washing those rounded cheeks and then sliding between them. His breath hitched. It had been weeks since Harry had been interested in anything, including Draco.
Harry didn't react, still not in the mood. He hadn't been, and while he wanted to have Draco feel good despite his mood, he couldn't bring himself to do it.
Draco gritted his teeth, sighing through his nose. "You going to wash my back?" he asked, holding the flannel out to Harry.
Harry took the flannel, and they both turned around. Harry began washing Draco's back. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
Draco looked back over his shoulder. "I need you to come back from this, Harry." His voice was low and caught in his throat.
Harry paused, chewing on his lip. "I love you," he murmured after a moment.
"Show me, Harry," Draco whispered, still looking at him. "Trust me, trust in us, that it will get better, that we will find a way to be a happy."
Harry nodded, leaning over to press his lips against Draco's. "I ... I just ...." It was hard to explain that sometimes it was just easier to give up and forget everything around him. "I'm sorry."
Draco leant back enough to kiss him again, then drew Harry's arm around himself as he did. After several kisses, he drew back again. "I understand how difficult this is for you, love. Just remember, I love you more than anything. Literally."
"Me too," Harry whispered, kissing Draco's cheek before he rested his head against the man's shoulder. "I missed you."
"Wash my hair?" Draco asked with a small smile.
"Will you wash mine?" Harry asked as he reached for the soap. "It smells ...."
"I love washing your hair," Draco answered, feeling the tension ease to hear Harry speaking again. Most people would think of Harry as dependent on Draco to take care of him. What they probably didn't realise was that Draco needed him just as much.
Harry smiled and squeezed some of the shampoo into his hands before he started to work it into Draco's hair.
Draco relaxed into it, enjoying the shampoo and the rinse and then happily turning around to do the same for Harry.
"I feel kind of stupid," Harry whispered, his eyes closing when Draco started to wash his hair.
"For being upset?" Draco asked, massaging his lover's scalp.
"And reacting that way," Harry replied.
Draco used a cup to pour water down Harry's hair, rinsing it. "It makes sense given ... your history."
"I know," Harry whispered. He knew that he was prone to having episodes like that probably for the rest of his life. He sighed.
They got out of the bath, towelling off and heading back into the bedroom where Draco picked up the brush, eager to comb through Harry's hair. "I'm running low on supplies," he said.
Harry knew that meant either ordering the supplies or going to Diagon Alley to get them. "I don't know if I can go outside, yet," he said.
Draco was disappointed but he nodded. "I can send an order," he said, patting the bed in front of him.
"Thank you," Harry murmured, sitting down on the bed. "I just ... I can't yet. I want to, though. Soon."
"Okay, love," Draco said, beginning to brush out Harry's hair. At least Harry was talking about it, starting out of his withdrawal. They would find a way past this, as they had everything else.
[Harry in a depressive slide and Draco at a loss...]
Chapter 7
Want to be kept up to date on new posts of this and other stories byslashpervert? Questions about friending or this journal? Click the "Frequently Asked Questions" link below:
There is also a yahoo groups mailing list with updates about current and future writings by Slashpervert and co-authors. Feel free to sign up HERE.
Title: Unexpected
Authors:
slashpervert and aveeno_baby.Betas:
brknhalo241, asm614, Mini Mouse, and Indie.Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: ADULT!
Genre: Fluff, Smut, Hurt/Comfort
Pairing: Harry/Draco
Length: 94,000 words (40 Chapters)
Warnings (Mark to Read): Language, Explicit, M/M Sex, Masturbation, Oral, Rimming, Anal, Mpreg, and mental health issues such as anxiety attacks. (Characters in this fiction are over 18.)
Summary: Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy have lived together for four years in their country house surrounded by a magical menagerie of unwanted animals Harry rescues. Yet, Harry wants more. He dreams of a family that includes children.
Notes: Post-war, AU after HBP, not DH compliant. Sequel to Undesirable, though can be read separately. Whereas, Undesirable was very dark, this one is very fluffy with some angst. Thanks to
corvusdea for help with Latin for spells. Icon adapted by slashpervert from Passion by dirty_darella.Disclaimer: This is a non-commercial work of fan fiction intended for adult audiences only. No copyright infringement intended. (Full Disclaimer!)
Chapter Number/Total: 6/40
Chapter Title: Come Back
Words: 2227 Words
The next day Harry woke up earlier than usual in the morning. He had been having a few dreams, most of them with Elijah or other children. He tried to push thoughts about that out of his mind, distracting himself by going downstairs and feeding the animals. Then he started on breakfast, heading upstairs about an hour later with a tray of food for himself and Draco. Draco, predictably, was still sprawled on the bed.
"Draco," Harry said, getting onto the bed and setting the tray down. He reached to nudge him.
"Mmm?" Draco responded sleepily, hand creeping across the bed toward Harry.
"Breakfast," Harry replied, taking his hand.
Draco blinked, yawning hugely as he stretched. He loved it when the first thing he saw each morning was Harry.
Harry leant over to kiss him. "Come on, breakfast," he said again.
Draco sat up, leaning against the headboard and Harry passed the food over to him, shifting a little closer so he could eat off his plate. Draco speared a strawberry from the bowl Harry had set on the tray and held it out to his lover.
Harry wasn't really hungry, just poking at his food after taking a few bites, but he automatically opened his mouth when Draco held out the strawberry.
Draco placed it in Harry's mouth, his body reacting to the sight of those lips closing around the fruit. Normally Harry would've smiled at him and reached to give Draco a strawberry, but today he just pulled back and chewed, looking back down at his plate. Draco picked up his cup, sipping his tea as he watched Harry. The day before had been difficult and Draco wasn't sure yet if Harry was calm or if this was just the quiet before the storm.
Harry remained quiet, looking off to the side as he idly munched on a sausage. There was so much going through his mind at that moment and he couldn't stop it.
Draco waited, eating his food and watching Harry. He was halfway through his tea when he sighed and reached out, running his fingers through his lover's hair. "How are you doing?"
Harry didn't reply at first, setting his fork down and closing his eyes. "I wanted today to be so great," he started to murmur, biting down on his lip.
Draco set his cup down on the tray and pushed it away. He took Harry's hand and pulled him closer.
"Like, I don't know ... I wasn't expecting to have Elijah here with us now, but today ...." He sighed, rubbing his hands over his face, feeling his eyes begin to water.
"Harry," Draco whispered, "it's okay to be upset." Draco slid his other hand around to the small of Harry's back, a gesture of comfort that also opened him up for Harry to curl against him if he wanted.
"I know, but, it doesn't make it any better," Harry whispered, turning to curl up against Draco's chest as the tears started to fall. "I wanted to take care of him ...."
Draco knew Harry didn't take loss well. He had already lost so much in his life, even before the war and then the trauma of his imprisonment and those he watched die. Draco realised that one of the first dreams Harry had had after beginning to really heal, was of having a family. "I am sorry I made it more difficult too," he said. "I want you to be happy."
"Don't blame this on yourself," Harry said quickly, shaking his head. "I love you ... and if I can't have children while I'm with you, then so be it. It just hurts right now."
Draco made a silent vow to not only contact his Solicitor about what had happened but to find out what wizarding laws said about adoption. "I never want to hurt you," he said, rubbing Harry's back in a soothing circle.
"I know," Harry whispered, sniffling as he wiped at his tears. He knew for a fact that Draco would never, ever harm him.
***
For the next few weeks, Harry didn't feel any better. He became quieter and quieter, and refused to leave the house when Draco even suggested them going to visit friends or for ice cream in Diagon Alley. Harry didn't want to see children. As strange as the thought was, Harry felt that if he saw them, he would think about Elijah and that still hurt him so much that he'd burst into tears at any random moment. So, of course, he didn't go to the orphanage either.
Draco had written to his Solicitor and had not been happy with the news he got back. Ministry of Magic regulations actually forbid wizards and witches from adopting Muggle children. Which meant, even if the orphanage had allowed it, they would have had other legal problems. He hadn’t been pleased to tell Harry, knowing it would only worsen the situation.
Harry was sitting in front of the telly just like he had been for days, still wearing his pyjamas, his knees pulled to his chest as he idly flicked through the channels.
Draco stood in the doorway from the kitchen, arms across his chest, contemplating his lover. Harry's slide, well, fall really, into depression wasn't unexpected but it was difficult. Draco had tried being understanding and letting Harry try to work through it, but it had gone on too long. For Harry's sake, he had to do something or risk an even worse setback. Draco sighed and stepped into the room, waiting to see if Harry even reacted to his presence.
Harry didn't, but he did know Draco was there. He rested his cheek against the top of his knees, letting more of his hair fall in his face
Draco shook his head and stepped between Harry and the television but Harry kept staring at Draco's midsection, as if he could see through him. So Draco reached for the remote.
Harry frowned slightly, but didn't try to reach and get it back. He finally looked up at Draco.
Draco turned the telly off and reached a hand out to tuck back the mess of black hair. "You need a bath," he said softly. Harry made a small face and looked down, shaking his head slightly. Draco crouched in front of him, so that even looking down, Harry could see him. "You stink, Potter," he said. It wasn't just true; it was also a reference to their fourth year at Hogwarts. He waited to see if Harry would get the joke.
Harry realised where it came from, but it just made him sniffle, his lips trembling as he wrapped his arms more tightly around his legs.
It was sort of a test. If Harry could laugh about that or even get annoyed, then he wasn't too bad off. His reaction told Draco that Harry really was having a full blown episode. "Who am I?" he asked.
Harry blinked away the tears that were welling up, not bothering to wipe them away. He licked his lips and tilted his head up a bit. "Malfoy ...."
"Malfoy is it?" Draco asked. "Are you mad at me?"
Harry shook his head slightly, sniffling again as he stared at him.
"Tell me again who I am then?"
"Draco," Harry mumbled this time, rubbing at his nose.
Draco rewarded him with at smile. "That's good. And where are we right now?"
"Home," Harry said replied softly.
"Yes," Draco said. "Will you take a bath with me?"
"Okay," Harry mumbled, but didn't move to get up. When Draco took his hands and stood up, tugging, Harry felt he had no choice but to stand too, not wanting to topple over.
Draco held on to one of Harry's arms, leading him to the stairs. "We'll take a nice bath together, get you out of those smelly pyjamas and into some clean clothes," Draco said soothingly.
Harry just nodded, pushing his hair away from his face. "Tired," he sighed.
Draco led him upstairs, having to pull a bit and then settled Harry to sit on the toilet seat while he got the bath filling. He turned back to Harry and sighed. The entire scene reminded him of the days when he had first gotten Harry out of St Mungo's. He reached to unbutton Harry's top. "I miss you," he whispered.
Harry bit his lip as he watched Draco, feeling the tears welling up again. "It hurts," he said quietly.
"I know, love," Draco said softly, stripping off Harry's shirt. "But you can't let it do this to you. I need you."
Harry shook his head, beginning to cry again as he stood up to have Draco pull his pants off.
Draco tugged them down and then shut off the taps. He tested the temperature of the water. "In you go," he said, taking Harry's arm to help him.
Harry stepped into the bath as his hands covered his face.
Draco made sure Harry was safely seated in the bath before setting to unbuttoning his own shirt. "You want me to join you?"
"Yes," Harry managed to mumble, his voice thick.
Draco undressed and then lowered himself into the bath, reaching for a flannel to soap up. Harry didn't look up at him yet, rubbing at his eye. Flannel soapy, Draco reached and took one of Harry's hands, lathering up his arm. Harry let him, letting his other hand drop, staring down at the water. Draco took his time, washing Harry's arms, shoulders and chest. "Turn around and I'll get your back."
Harry quietly did as he was told, pulling his knees up to his chest.
Draco washed him, flannel sliding down his lover's back. "More?"
Harry shrugged slightly, lifting himself up a little for Draco.
Draco tried not to let his body react as he slid his flannel covered hand down below Harry's waist, washing those rounded cheeks and then sliding between them. His breath hitched. It had been weeks since Harry had been interested in anything, including Draco.
Harry didn't react, still not in the mood. He hadn't been, and while he wanted to have Draco feel good despite his mood, he couldn't bring himself to do it.
Draco gritted his teeth, sighing through his nose. "You going to wash my back?" he asked, holding the flannel out to Harry.
Harry took the flannel, and they both turned around. Harry began washing Draco's back. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
Draco looked back over his shoulder. "I need you to come back from this, Harry." His voice was low and caught in his throat.
Harry paused, chewing on his lip. "I love you," he murmured after a moment.
"Show me, Harry," Draco whispered, still looking at him. "Trust me, trust in us, that it will get better, that we will find a way to be a happy."
Harry nodded, leaning over to press his lips against Draco's. "I ... I just ...." It was hard to explain that sometimes it was just easier to give up and forget everything around him. "I'm sorry."
Draco leant back enough to kiss him again, then drew Harry's arm around himself as he did. After several kisses, he drew back again. "I understand how difficult this is for you, love. Just remember, I love you more than anything. Literally."
"Me too," Harry whispered, kissing Draco's cheek before he rested his head against the man's shoulder. "I missed you."
"Wash my hair?" Draco asked with a small smile.
"Will you wash mine?" Harry asked as he reached for the soap. "It smells ...."
"I love washing your hair," Draco answered, feeling the tension ease to hear Harry speaking again. Most people would think of Harry as dependent on Draco to take care of him. What they probably didn't realise was that Draco needed him just as much.
Harry smiled and squeezed some of the shampoo into his hands before he started to work it into Draco's hair.
Draco relaxed into it, enjoying the shampoo and the rinse and then happily turning around to do the same for Harry.
"I feel kind of stupid," Harry whispered, his eyes closing when Draco started to wash his hair.
"For being upset?" Draco asked, massaging his lover's scalp.
"And reacting that way," Harry replied.
Draco used a cup to pour water down Harry's hair, rinsing it. "It makes sense given ... your history."
"I know," Harry whispered. He knew that he was prone to having episodes like that probably for the rest of his life. He sighed.
They got out of the bath, towelling off and heading back into the bedroom where Draco picked up the brush, eager to comb through Harry's hair. "I'm running low on supplies," he said.
Harry knew that meant either ordering the supplies or going to Diagon Alley to get them. "I don't know if I can go outside, yet," he said.
Draco was disappointed but he nodded. "I can send an order," he said, patting the bed in front of him.
"Thank you," Harry murmured, sitting down on the bed. "I just ... I can't yet. I want to, though. Soon."
"Okay, love," Draco said, beginning to brush out Harry's hair. At least Harry was talking about it, starting out of his withdrawal. They would find a way past this, as they had everything else.
[Harry in a depressive slide and Draco at a loss...]
Chapter 7
Want to be kept up to date on new posts of this and other stories by
slashpervert? Questions about friending or this journal? Click the "Frequently Asked Questions" link below:
There is also a yahoo groups mailing list with updates about current and future writings by Slashpervert and co-authors. Feel free to sign up HERE.